Ask Amy: We set our Christmas boundaries, and they called us chilly

Dear Amy: We are dreading the approaching holidays.

My husband’s brother and his family (wife and two kids) want to come and spend up to 10 days with us.

They have done so in the past and it hasn’t been a problem, but both my husband and I now work remotely from a home office.

We asked if they could limit their time spent here to a few days because it is difficult juggling work and having guests for an extended period.

They were miffed and accused us of being unwelcoming.

How do we set appropriate boundaries and let them know they are welcome, but that it is burdensome to accommodate their request for a longer stay?

– Burdened

Dear Burdened: You already let these family members know what your boundaries are regarding this holiday visit. Good for you!

They reacted rudely to you stating these boundaries – bad for them!

If you are still at all interested in hosting this crew, as the holidays approach you can contact them to let them know: “You are welcome to stay with us for the nights of December 23, 24, 25 (or whichever nights you choose). After that we need to go back to work in our home office, but there is a nearby Airbnb (or hotel, motel, or other family members), if you want to stay in the area longer. Then at least we could see you on some evenings, if that would work for you.”

A 10-day hosting marathon for a family with children over the holidays is extreme, even if you’re not hosting them in what has become your home-based workplace.

Dear Amy: I’m a 16-year-old girl. I just started my junior year of high school. I’m doing a pretty good job so far.

My dilemma is that I’m worried that I’ll never lose my virginity in my 20s because I don’t have “experience” yet.

Whenever I read about people saying that they don’t want to be with a virgin, it makes me feel even worse.

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